Why Young Lives Are Losing Meaning and Purpose VI: The Universe Doesn’t Negotiate Or “Welcome to the Matrix”

By M.K. Styllinski

Kazuakai Tanahashi | brushmind.com

“‘Soul-making’ needs to be re-imagined and reintegrated into our societies. We need not go back to animism or alchemy to find soul-making. We can find it here, in the everyday Now. …The interior life should be recognized as an inherent human need, and it should be socially acceptable and encouraged to direct part of our gaze in its direction. After all, if the outer sun rises but the inner sun does not, then nothing has been gained.”

~ Kingley L. Dennis

Reading time: 20-25 mins

This exploration of happiness seems to have morphed into that which underlies the seeking, namely what it really means to change ourselves and if there is something deeper to access. Change is about leaping into the unknown and battling with the dark recesses of our unconscious mind which have so far evaded detection yet continue to sabotage the promise of a life of meaning and purpose. Even if we have attained a semblance of peace and success in this world, depression and inner dissatisfaction continue to arise. This suggests something much deeper is going on and that exhortations to find happiness will only paper over the ever-widening cracks in our psyches.

Regardless of your beliefs discovering meaning and purpose is a spiritual quest. By “spiritual” I mean the will to obtain balance and creative flow with life, living in the Tao, or honouring the Divine in our thoughts and actions. The eventual result is more harmonious relationships and a constructive daily life. We create something unique in that exchange because we have made the effort to achieve it – it is our contribution borne from an accumulation of experience; a struggle that eventually bears fruit and from which everyone can be nourished. Happiness results, as a byproduct of observable results, namely, the effects we have on others. When that begins to occur, our state of Being radiates and effects whatever social unit we find ourselves embedded. But we have to cultivate resilience from a centre of calm within to let such dividends arrive. This process comes from simple understandings and life lessons which haven’t really changed much for thousands of years.

If you are skeptical that one person can change the world then we’d be in agreement. But one person who changes their inner world positively must logically cause ripples of change in the outer reality. We are wired to cooperate and to adapt to tumultuous circumstances. If your intent and consequent effort remains consistent you’ll connect with others doing the same. Being alone in daily life is not a good survival tactic as our ancient ancestors realised. This is the nature of real-life social networks: a contagion for good or for ill can spread in a non-linear bursts of transference, given enough key connectors. So, there is no reason we can’t transform ourselves, and by extension, our family life, the neighbourhood and local community, if we form or tap into the right kind of networks. As discussed throughout this series, applied knowledge/spirituality should be useful – useful to our own aims and to those of others, otherwise, what’s the point? As author Kurt Vonnegut, reminded us: “Find a way to be useful; if you aren’t useful you are useless.”

That doesn’t mean we seek global transformation because that very desire tends to run up against hubris and the consequent road blocks of ideology. Reality simply isn’t designed to be second guessed in that way. But we can start small and build seed-visions of quality that have tangible results in our lives. These seeds of change determine the quality of all that follows and sends a signal to the information field that we choose to join and augment the creative dynamics of reality, rather than enforcing our visions onto people and situations which, though well-intentioned, often add to the chaos commensurate with the law of unintended consequences. (Good intentions divorced from self-awareness and critical thinking – but satisfying for the emotions – always makes things worse).

The will to change from what is clearly not working to other more harmonious possibilities may not lead to spectacular revolutionary fireworks but then, constructive change seldom manifests this way. Usually, in terms of inner work, it’s just hard drudgery and a battle we must do alone even when surrounded by intense social interaction. (No one knows our weaknesses quite like we do). In the beginning, depending on the level of transformation you seek, sticking with it will eventually cause minor to major changes to your environment and the people with whom you associate some way down the line. In the short-term, you might have little to show for it, but when you keep going, step by step, day after day, month after month with incremental victories you suddenly realise that you are positively different and your life signals that change.

Within reason and provided there are no extremes which trap the mind, it doesn’t really matter which system of belief you follow at this stage as long as truthfulness is the prime mover and it gives you a moral platform upon which to apply your knowledge and the opportunity for feedback. The two must go together however, since honouring truth is pretty much what informs our ethics and reinvigorate our sense of morality. For example, you may be a member of an occult or esoteric school; a religious order or a self-help group with the latest cognitive and neuropsychological techniques. Perhaps you attend a simple meet up group based around gardening or psychotherapy and counselling. As long as it has a framework which helps you to disengage from addictive behaviours – intellectual/emotional or physical – this can be useful for establishing goals and strengthening your moral compass. At least, in the beginning. The idea is to shed any beliefs that hold you back. It’s about tapping in to the kind of values that nourishes your mind so that you have enough psychic energy available to heal and integrate. Those who are addicts of the more traditional kind, with drugs, sex or alcohol as the demons of choice, then programs must be willingly chosen and completed before embarking on self-development of this kind. Similarly, healing one’s emotions and deep body trauma from the past takes time. The struggle to be better, to see oneself as one really is and to take steps to transform our negative habits and behaviours is the intent that binds all of us who attempt such a quest – whoever and wherever we are.

Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.”

— Matthew 7:7

In the above quotation from the Bible, Matthew isn’t suggesting a form of spiritual materialism where we just simply ask and God dumps a new car on our drive or makes all the adversity vanish. This is about being closer to God by drawing out the the spark of His divinity within us – despite the pressures of the pig-sty. It’s about re-activating conscience in a culture that suffocates it and releasing those psychic chains as a conscious act of will. Any addiction demands that will. And we are immersed in our cultures often subtle addictive inducements. By withdrawing and going cold turkey we suffer but we suffer consciously, as a means to a definite end. It’s the seeking of help in igniting the alchemical fire which must be given the oxygen of an adaptive mind, a creative will and the ability to endure. Which is why simple acts of service for others outside your own focus will provide channels through which the “heat” produced from this journey can find release and the knowledge gained in your quest can be disbursed.

There’s a reason we are social animals. We seldom survive alone, and the diversity of interaction can birth new realities, or as the famous metaphysician and psychiatrist Carl Jung put it: “The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.” That light of true transformation, leaves it’s mark in the ether and is transmitted through the very DNA of our ancestors and progeny. Respect for those ancestors who broke the chains of darkness is more than folklore and superstition – such victories are in the very genes of the past and hold the promise of a different future according to how much we are willing to sacrifice to that end, knowing that we are part of much more than just a petulant wish for a slice of seesaw happiness. It’s then that we might realise that none of this is all about us, as an individual marooned on his or her own island of perception.

Anything we seek to create with meaning and purpose, on a deeply personal level and with honourable intent – counts. It’s paradoxical: we are nothing yet we are everything: interrelated, interdependent and connected in ways we are only just beginning to comprehend. For everyone that finds happiness in simple acts of existence – just the mere fact that we are here and we are conscious (or trying to be) – this allows a growing receptivity to mysterious creative forces that can slowly dissolve the layers of false information and various social masks which have presented an impediment to growth.

If we are stagnating and we cannot be influenced ourselves, how can we hope to influence our social environment?

From my own experience as one who has run the gamut of self-pity, rage, depression and existential cowardice, I can tell you that there is a response that is almost mathematical in its precision to properly directed effort. To reiterate, it requires we let go of the desire to be happy while establishing optimum levels of receptivity in ourselves and our environment so that happiness can “desire” us – not the other way around. The more you seek it, the more it will run from you, spooked by the harsh electrical charge of emotional need. Ever see an animal touch an electric fence? Positive emotions and creative states of being are much like that. Such emergent qualities cannot approach if there is too much desire, too much intensity for the self. When an equilibrium begins to be re-established, enough psychic space is re-organised and the focus is directed outward, then these qualities can be allowed to emerge.

At one stage in my life I had pretty much lost everything that was dear to me and I was utterly clueless – at least consciously – as to how I had been the architect of my own misfortune. I did however, want to go beyond the happiness seesaw and discover something much deeper: to be someone who acted, as far as I was able, in honour of truth. This had always been a vestigial yearning though warped by the short-term desires of our culture and my own trenchant weaknesses. Since I’d been hopelessly running before I could even crawl, maybe it was time for serious questions rather than buying into the “free spirit” meme and winging it for the millionth time. It was only when I threw in the towel of my own hubris and attempts to control (and escape from) external reality that I was ready to pose a question that would determine the rest of my life.

Without pleading or beseeching I asked:

“Creative Universe…I seek to be more than I am. I seek to be of service to Love, Truth, Goodness and Beauty. Please assist me in that process knowing that I will do whatever it takes to get there.”

And that’s when the crap really hit the fan.

I was in effect, asking to have the parts of my personality that had been bent out of shape placed in the fire and recast. And of course, over the subsequent months and years I thought of that question and began to bargain with it when things got tough:

“You know when I said I’d do whatever it takes? How long is this going to take exactly? …Was I really that messed up?”

Probably. We can’t be aware of that which we are unaware. Unless we get a wake up call that’s sufficiently shocking to ignite that realisation, it usually takes considerable time, if it occurs at all. We human beings are very stubborn creatures. We tend to stay with what we know, even if that’s total or partial dysfunction.

So, whether or not you ask that question, that’s entirely up to you. However, if you do, a reply will be forthcoming. It won’t come as a voice in your head or a message stuck to the windshield of your car (although it could). It certainly won’t come as instant happiness or success just because you are thinking positively or buying into the consumerist “Law of Attraction.” It’s more likely to arise in the day to day minutiae of your life.

While it will be precisely what you need, it won’t necessarily be what you want.

How much you resist this process and fail to commit through vacillation and procrastination will determine how many mini-schisms you field between the reality you envisage and a return to Zombieland. At the same time, that’s part of the friction required as you become progressively unpalatable to the technosphere that wants to extract your energy to fuel its unsustainable existence. And as your existence begins to embody the universe’s answer to you, the petulant and downright monstrous aspect of your shadow personality will fight like a wild animal to remain blind to the emerging guidance that is open to everyone who seeks to find their essence. And it is all too easy to become the archetypal Judas or Cypher of The Matrix and yield to our accustomed somnambulism. Our ego-mask and its unconscious forces will use every conceivable trick in the book to retain control and if successful (as it usually is) meaning, purpose and soul influence will remain as distant as ever. But if you do stay with it, upheaval will be the natural result as you take your first steps toward a higher vision of what’s possible.

Constructive change may arrive at an excruciatingly slow pace or you could see rapid developments. Again, this depends what level of metamorphosis you choose to adopt and how much self-knowledge you have acquired concerning your limitations and potential. Hence the reason to get to know your deep-seated weaknesses and strengths. The pace might differ for each of us but the ultimate goal is the same: freedom of the mind and the formation of a new personality under the tutelage of the conscience or soul. Even if we lay the groundwork – that will be a huge achievement.

Regarding alike pleasure and pain,

Gain and loss, success and defeat, prepare

Yourself for battle. Thus you will

Incur no sin.

— Bhagavad-Gita

When we ask such a question of the Universe, God, Allah, the Higher Self or whatever personification of Truth is meaningful, and we ask sincerely, we are often in a state of despair thus momentarily allowing access to the soul, or if you prefer, what is best in ourselves. Asking unconditionally is akin to an ancient form of prayer and you can be sure you are unlocking your own personal access code, much like a cosmic password for some much needed updates. With that question comes an agreement or contract, if you will. And if you decide to “shut down” your agreement and thus the assistance that comes your way you’ll likely make the “software” of your own system crash in a variety of instructive ways. You’ll get the “lessons” you need to burn off all that accumulated rubbish that prevented you moving forward, but they’ll be amplified by the dissonance you set up by indecision and a lack of committment to that contract you agreed to sign. Things go pear-shaped when we naturally get cold-feet.

One of the consequences of realising that your sincerity was only operating in that moment of wailing desperation and you now want to get off the transformation train you have set in motion, is that you will suffer more acutely and at the same time, unnecessarily. Any unnecessary suffering adds to chaos and attunes to the vibration of evil. Any action that requires building momentum (thus quality) over time doesn’t do so well when we lose faith and give in to impulse. Negative forces persuade us that it’s all in our head or that we are weak and pitiful – which we generally are. But that needn’t always be the case. That’s why we are attempting to take responsibility for ourselves and our own psyche. As the Christ archetype teaches us, it takes persistent attention to the ideal of actualising your potential. It requires sacrifice of the old self that keeps us trapped in diminishing returns, thereby holding you back from your destiny. By believing this symbiosis of lies between our culture and our tacit acceptance, we choose to be held back and therefore imbue the power of ignorance and unconscious behaviour in humanity just that bit more.

Once you make that leap into the unknown and you can no longer ignore your conscience, you’ll be accessing the archetypal realm of the hero who seeks freedom from his or her chains. It may not happen immediately, but your life WILL change based on that sincerity, the frequency of intent you set up and how deeply you have been inured in this materialist void. It’s your job to maintain that resolution. You’ll be enacting the same surreal drama of Neo in The Matrix who awakens from his pod that has had him hooked into a vast simulation of authenticity. When that happens, at some point during that awakening, the mechanics of Official Culture will be alerted to the fact and a General Law of suppression and seductions to induce/enforce you back to sleep will be automatically initiated. If you falter, as we all do, that’s all part of the process of stumbling up the staircase. But if you make a conscious decision to return to the zombification of your life with all its enculturated narcissism – effectively shitting on your new found awareness and knowledge – then you can expect to invite to invoke a Greek Tragedy for your movie rather than a mystery thriller.

So, to repeat: be very sure of your intentions before asking this question. Be clear about what you are prepared to give up and whether you are ready for that leap.

The Universe doesn’t negotiate.

“Only a person who has passed through the gate of humility can ascend to the heights of the spirit.”

— Rudolf Steiner

Step By Step…

Depending on how much work there is to do in ridding oneself of social programming, conditioning, parental influences, trauma and abuse etc., the asking of this question appears to take you at your Word and deliver people and events that will provide you the opportunity to do exactly that: “To be more than you are and align yourself to Love, Truth, Goodness and Beauty” thereby actively serving “something bigger than yourself.” Your very struggles become an act of redemption not only for you, but potentially for others. If you think about it, it’s about as ambitious as it gets. But it’s a heck of a lot more meaningful than seeking a transient bubble of conditional happiness that constantly deflates when one of those proverbial arrows of “outrageous fortune” hits the mark for the umpteenth time.

That said, once you open that window as a key potential/choice then its a veritable Pandora’s box that you must be equipped to handle. That’s why slow but sure is the only way and having a healthy respect for the forces you have set in motion. In much the same way as those who clamour to radically change society with no practical solutions to replace what they tear down, so too with your personality. Dismantle that false persona brick by brick rather than running into that wall with reinforced intellect and undue haste. Heal and integrate those parts of yourself that you recognise as destructive. The last thing you want is to be caught “between two stools” – where persistence has vanished and you’ve stirred up a lot of silt which lies on the surface causing more harm than if you’d let it be. Gautama Buddha cautioned us on this point by stating: “There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth: not going all the way and not starting.” Sure, you’ll suffer on this path toward an ideal but you don’t want to end up squeezing twenty years of accumulated spiritual debt down on your head because you thought you could take it. Nonetheless, never doubt you have made the right decision in your darkest moments.

Embarking on a conscious process to release that creative power and utility has to be grounded in actions which may initially comprise doing very little except learning to be passive and allowing the space for changes to occur. Or, as Confucius counselled: “Those that live their life in Tao achieve realization of their nature in inaction.” To act with true agency for the future means building that capability. Such potential cannot just arrive in your lap in a month or so wrapped in a nice pink bow signed: “Universe XX.” It means you are sending a signal to your chosen higher focus and becoming the storyteller or the observer of your own “heroic” deeds. Again, you’ll likely be alone in this intensely personal process which will bring up all kinds of misunderstandings from others which you’ll have to endure with sporadic integrity (and a lot of inner whining).

At some point, you will begin to see that you have two selves which can be likened to the religious metaphor of the good and bad angel sitting on your shoulders and whispering temptations and admonishments in your ears. One is the mercurial villain of old symbolising your old life of impulsivity, weakness and willful blindness, and the new warrior (guided by a Higher potential) climbing the mountain away from the past. These two will do battle everyday and it’s the friction between these “characters” that will create the new reality. Just as we strive to find the fulcrum on the happiness-unhappiness seesaw and obtain a foundation of habituated balance, so too we must continue to build on that foundation so that negative, destructive thoughts and self-serving desires do not eclipse any hope for further transformation. Or, as clinical psychologist Jordan B. Peterson has stated on more than one occasion: “Reality is an amalgam of chaos and order. Your role is to mediate between them successfully.” In that way, you become part of the ancient ancestors who respected the underworld and who undertook the same process to go beyond the human animal and to face their shadows to become closer to God.

Our thoughts matter because they lead to choices that determine our destiny. And each choice we make to better ourselves, no matter how small, has an effect in ways that may not become clear until years down the line.

It doesn’t sound like much of a recipe for happiness right?

Again, it depends how far you want to take it and how by how much you can forget yourself. Or at least, understand that such a process implies a slow decentralisation of your previously selfish focus. With self-knowledge comes receptivity and an expansion outward and away from unceasing self-gratification rather than any fixation inwards. Perhaps there is no separation between inner and outer dimensions of reality? We might very well be a focused unit of consciousness, a world in microcosm brought forth through biology and the unrelenting drive of evolution. This powerful force of creation could conceivably be married to a download of eternal Being that seeks expression, temporarily imprisoned by matter to strengthen that existence and to ultimately go beyond the human experience. Or, we may be an accident with no meaning whatsoever. I prefer to listen to the wisdom of mathematical probability that such an “accident” is highly unlikely.

That being so, what are we going to do when the arc rises from inaction to action?

Robert Irwin Untitled, 1968

Unfortunately, there are never any free lunches and no spiritual helicopters to drop us at the summit of our highest ideals and expectations. The learning is in the ascent. But there’s no reason why we can’t start the climb. And it’s having that firm intent with no rationalizations and no recourse to self-pity that creates the conditions where the future can hold a golden potential for as long as you keep going. And in fact, that future merges with the present. Ask any “gifted” person who has been phenomenally successful whether it is building a start up from scratch, writing a series of best-selling novels or headlining at a concert – they will tell you it took one hellva lot of hard work, persistence and daily practice. It also took some creative flare that comes from thinking outside the box and finding ways to keep their vision alive. The same with personal transformation.

Apart from doing that which you enjoy, any warrior of their art – be it in music or sport – will say that to acquire excellence, it requires mastery of the mind and body, continual and unrelenting practice where strangely enough, enjoyment seldom features, at least, not while you are beginning that journey. It usually means a lot of pain and frustration. If you are enjoying it then you have plateaued and you are not progressing. Gotta keep pushing, married to real-world restraints. In effect, when you decide to settle with what you’ve attained so far, you have made your home halfway up the mountain with all the attendant consequences. That’s okay. Knowing our limits is vital as is pausing to take stock on our journey. But if you want to progress and be your best you must persist. And “mastery” may initially just mean seeing what you might be capable of and artfully discovering it.

Life can be an art form. We become an artist by making our lives the only true canvas.

The American Sculptor and installation artist Robert Irwin went to the heart of the matter when he wrote: “To be an artist is not a matter of making paintings or objects at all. What we are really dealing with is our state of consciousness and the shape of our perceptions.” We can take transfer this creative act by directing it upon ourselves. This means we are potentially both warrior and artist when forging a new self and re-discovering what was always there. Great art requires dedication, committment and discipline in order to bring out the grace and beauty inherent in authenticity. The messenger becomes the message: a living example of truth. We become walking works in progress, consciously creating ourselves anew in the face of disruptive forces. As Aristotle explained it, like any discipline: “Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.”

Can we habituate ourselves toward that which is authentic? Perhaps that depends on how much we can sacrifice to our highest conception of Self. We are far more likely to do this when we have established a healthy community within our psyche, and therefore offering the potential of such a community of like minds in our environment. A different kind of lasting happiness can be ours through mastering the art of reinvention toward a singular aim: to be responsible for our own unique destiny.


The reason for why there is such an absence of happiness, meaning and purpose is not just the fact that we seek it and what’s worse, we look for it in all the wrong places. The biggest problem seems to be that we allow that same fear and doubt to fuel a belief that we must do what our culture, the “experts” and institutions of authority say we should do. By doing so, we give up our freedom to make genuine choices arrived at by listening to the voice of our intuition married to critical thinking and accumulated knowledge through which the Universe speaks to us. And as you’ll discover, if you haven’t already, it has a sense of cosmic humour. And we can perceive that humour in the patterns of synchronicities because we are not only hardwired to catch such things, but to interpret the symbolism within the rich mosaic of life itself. (More on that in a moment).

Ultimately, all strife, conflict and struggle is about the individual and collective choices we make to come to terms with two streams of Being and Non-being; positive and negative; creativity and entropy. It is the articulation and expression of choices made and choices lost; it is the ever-present but faint urging of the soul for us to grow its presence and to tread the road to freedom away from the low “hum” of matter. What choice will we make? And will we stick to it? Or will we spend possibly lifetimes of stagnation and repetition with leaps to the extremes of either pole, never getting off the ontological fence?

This is the real Christian hell into which we are cast and which so many barely register, since an existential hell is easy to normalise through psychopathic inculcation. And if dislocated from living examples of spiritual truth in action and disconnected from the symbolic language of nature and dreams, why would anyone think there is anything else? In that sense, it is no wonder that happiness will always be a sine wave that rises and falls in line with our divisive fixations.

“There is one story left, one road: that it is. And on this road there are very many signs that, being, is uncreated and imperishable, whole, unique, unwavering, and complete.”

— Parmenides

Welcome to the Real World

A decision to stake our claim to the eternal nature of consciousness requires courage if we are to be more than just a bio-chemical machine. It is then that the Universe offers nuggets of relational, synchronistic and analogical wisdom that we can use to move ourselves forward. It doesn’t mean that life dynamics are somehow tailored to our personal whims and preferences, rather, we slowly but surely align ourselves to a collective dimension of wisdom which lies beyond the senses but permeates Mind. The Universe replies to the signal we have set up by expressing and stepping down a response (perhaps from our completed self in the future?). It seems to me that it does so  through the medium of matter and the interplay between thought, action and the energy that traverses all reality dimensions known and unknown. If our reality is symbolic of things at other levels of reality (“as above, so below”) then we can learn that language by paying close attention to our relationship with everything contained within the material world and our soul’s messaging system: dreams. Guidance comes from this and it is exactly how dreams, myths, storytelling and the history of our ancestors represent and communicate patterns of collective behaviour repeated over time which become encapsulated as wisdom in our individual lives.

If that’s veering a little too far toward word salad speculation let me illustrate by way of a seemingly mundane example.

About 12 years ago I was at an extremely low ebb. Through my own hubris I had lost much of what I valued, both in terms of material possessions, a place to live and my social community. The following morning after this earthquake event I arose from my dormitory bed in a downtown hostel and wandered out into the street to have a cup of coffee. I looked down at the pavement and felt numb, divorced from reality. Depression was lurking again and with it the return to Zombieland. In effect, my world wasn’t what I thought it was and nor was my purpose, thus my identity. As a defence mechanism which had stayed with me since childhood I had been lapsing in and out of a dissociative state to cope. On this occasion, something made me look up and re-focus. The first thing I saw was a hairdresser’s right in front of me and on the door was the following signage with bold white letters against a black background:

“Hello [M.K.], Welcome to the Matrix.”

Quite apart from the fact that it was using my Christian name, a name not so common in this particular country, it appeared to be a very direct synchronicity and matched my thoughts with extraordinary accuracy. It was both literally and symbolically a “sign” loaded with meaning given my circumstances at that moment as well as may studies involving the “Matrix” of our culture. I had ostensibly “ejected” myself from a shared spiritual path due to an inability to let go of the old personality and its addictions. How could I cope with deeper metaphysical truths and apply them when I was barely coping with the ABC of daily life?

The question then was this: did this little message convey the possibility that I had been given an opportunity to wake up to the very thing that I had been studying externally, intellectually, yet had not the courage to address emotionally and in the context of inner life? I snapped out of my state and saw a glimmer of humour in the situation. Self-pity and self-importance are products of our blanket narcissism taken as normality. I was no different after all, since I had fallen back into those norms as easily as a duck to water, despite years of exposure to metaphysical instruction.

I wanted a spiritual path and I got it.

My monumental underestimation was now seen as a gift and the recognition that such a decision to transform (and thus go counter to the Matrix of Official Culture) meant a willingness to heal and re-program one’s personal mind/body matrix. So, this “welcome” wasn’t an offer to embrace the Matrix. This message, as I chose to see it, reminded me that my ambition had thus far not matched reality. It had merely been a set of denied traumas and emotional blocks rationalised into a form of escape. Do not run before you can walk. Now, here was another choice to take a more moderate route; an opportunity to observe the Matrix and master its wily ways.

The material world and nature interface with our psycho-biochemical systems in mysterious ways, producing certain laws, causes and effects which must be understood and respected if we are to attain a semblance of autonomy away from group-instinct and its official narratives. The trick is to see and comprehend the forces of materialism, selfishness and endless variations of pathology and not be caught up in their nets of influence. When we give in to such a “Matrix” we become just another source of “food”. And once we see those behaviours and their consequences we can learn how to live in that world yet not be part of it, starting with the spring-cleaning and defence of our psyche and conscience.

Whether arranged by what we may call one’s Higher Self or merely a subconscious choice to apply meaning to a strangely coincidental alignment of inner thought to outer image, it was a message that was symbolic of the fact that I was at a crossroads: rejoin our narcissistic culture and sink deeper into its programming or continue with a little more humility. “Welcome to the Matrix” was in fact: “NOW you can start living by mastering this material world and its fears – your fears.”

It showed me how its conditioning was still flowing through the personality as evidenced from my recent “failure.” And acknowledged failure is how we learn lessons that can lead to a form of graduation toward a different state of Being. But first we have to understand that many of the choices and decisions we make are from the Matrix/Official Culture linked through an artificial umbilical cord to our own ego/personality. It has nothing much to do with truth, only a narcissistic survival in the face of innumerable incursions into our true essence by the dominance of negative forces too numerous to count. The Matrix’s idea of happiness is to feed us counterfeit versions in a bid to keep us docile and fixated on sensation. The accoutrements of consumer culture is fed to us as an analgesic; a cooling balm to sooth the soul as as we continue to sell it for a piece of happiness, defined on its terms.

It was time to find my own terms of contract. And I’d just been woken up to that fact from the front door of a hairdresser in a high street.

“Soul-making” is nothing if not practical.


What it all means

Nothing new under the sun. The repeating patterns of a pathocratic elite reaching like Icarus to the centre of their own dark sun is the archetype of hubris – reaching for ultimate control and power because that’s what their role is. Whether a metaphor or a prehistoric reality, the crumbling of Atlantis and the Flood; the fall of the Roman Empire and any other foci of power down through the five ages of man, they all ended up decadent and degenerate and fell into their own entropic footprint. This dynamic is as old as the Earth and provides a rich panopoly of lessons for individuals to grow the soul. You can’t change these psychopathic manifestations because they act as the anvil upon which those with conscience can begin to sharpen their psycho-spiritual abilities. Without friction and the inevitable suffering there is no growth – where it counts. Maybe it’s in that way that evil and the “enemy” is the Great Teacher.

The lesson embedded in The Hissy Fit Generation and Why Young Lives Are Losing Meaning and Purpose is this: a generational lack of confidence ensures an ultimate suggestibility by authority. With ease of suggestibility comes greater control over populations. If you are unwilling to accept that we live in societies and cultures utterly drowning in hierarchical, linguistic auto-suggestion then you are irrevocably lost. You have already assimilated enough memetic programming to make sure that your life is not your own but a fascimille of the pathological mind in minor or major ways. In other words, you agument the technosphere and Official Culture with an alien intent and objectives not your own.

And what checks and balances do we have in place to preclude such mind parasites? The illusion of democracy and ideological abstractions are routinely infiltrated and used against us. Awareness of this fact is one of the most crucial directors of the truly independent mind. The emerging youth of today lack positive role models and proper map for the forces that impinge upon their developing consciousness. Choosing a way of life that does not re-hash the same old programming patterns of compliance, camouflaged as resistance means “piercing the veil” of Official Culture before the age of 20 in order to build internal mental and emotional confidence and courage. These are threatening to that matrix of control. So, we must start with extricating ourselves from that which is deceptive and false. And we cannot do that until we allow a certain amount of internal change an “re-modelling” away from dominant programming.

I repeat these themes ad nauseum because they must be. How else to bypass the entrenched domination of programmed repsonses? The mind must be exposed to constructive suggestions, but it must first understand why for them to be purpose-built and workable. Without that foundation weak minds are open to anything that gives fake emotional succour and transient comfort.

Creating one’s own agency requires an openness toward the kind of negative feedback that disintegrates the mental and emotional obstructions which have crystallized and poisoned your autonomy and ability to be authentic. From disintegration comes the hope of re-integration toward meaning and purpose that individual, spiritual sovereignty bestows. We must learn to see all these warnings and signposts of what is effectively the antithesis of conscience and work to defend against such encroachments that can distort or re-route our capacity to respond constructively.

Lies, deceit, mediocrity and ignorance are now endemic in often subtle ways. (How ironic in this Age of Information). If we try to live by various ancient wisdom teachings of the past and assist where we can with practical and pragmatic solutions implemented in our own dwelling and locality and based on quality information…We might then turn that information into applied knowledge. Be the change, in other words and unleash a constructive vision in our own communities. Discerning lies from truth is essential but there comes a time where manifestations of these revelations must begin to appear.

The material world IS improving despite the spectres of climate change, poverty and the weapons industry. Yet, the human mind is not so lucky. The pathocratic focus has shifted toward what makes us human – conscience – and how to numb it out of existence through sensory addiction and dependance. If you can atomise conscience and scatter consciousness into fragmented, disparate units in need of external authorities then control will arise from seemingly benign influences which have “saved us.” This is the trajectory we are under care of a drip-feed techno-sorcery still designed to make us servile, unthinking and dependent. If that’s still hard to swallow then I suggest treating it as a hypotheses worthy of testing. Gain knowledge, work on yourself and usher in an open mind and you will see the truth of this scenario which will then offer you a choice in perception and action.

You cannot change this world or those who naturally resonant to primal matter, whether it’s a transhumanist update of the Olympian Gods or the endless consumption/corporatocracy that defines our values for us. It’s the image of the psychopath’s reality and those foolish enough to buy into it. They are what they are. Perhaps the best thing we can do is use that anger to build something entirely different to what is being shoved down our throats and in most cases willingly accepted, consciously or unconsciously.

Ideologies, memes and socially-programmed constructs ultimately lead back to the All-Seeing-Eye that feeds off our ignorance.

Now is the time to actually act on this information by asking ourselves: What can I do to improve myself and in so doing, improve the life of others? What can I DO parallel to finding the truth?

What can I do to improve my inner world so that it is reflected in my environment? How can I actualise the truth in simple, material ways that work?

It is this course of action that will determine the quality and outcome of human freedom, not whether you march against Monsanto or write letters to your congressman. The latter plays a part, but don’t anticipate your voice will change things. Real change doesn’t work that way. If we can only (understandably) gnash our teeth and rage against those that perpetuate pathology in this world, and all the crimes which masquarade as normality, then all this important information will merely appeal to and placate our righteous indignation but little else.

What ways can this dormant creative energy be awakened and utilised so that it begins to affect change at the inner and then local level? What kind of talents and abilities do we have which can be used to create and/or build real communities in our local villages, towns, suburbs and city centres?

First, we need to make ourselves unpalatable to pathogenic incursions. That means adopting qualities of mind that increase our ability to be powerfully independent, loving, creative and strong.

We’ll look at some of these in the next post.

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